My Worth

It has come to my attention that ‘qualified’ babysitters in my area of residence are paid $25 USD per hour. The reason the word qualified is in quotation marks is because we’re not talking about 16-year-old Susie looking to make a couple of extra bucks to help fund the new shoes she’s been eyeing. We’re talking about babysitters who have taken childhood education courses, with years of experience, and solid references.

$25 per hour is nothing to scoff at, my friend.

This got me thinking. If I were paid like the babysitter, what would my worth be? I’m a numbers person, so this was easy.

If stay-at-home moms got paid like babysitters, they would make: $25/hr x 13 hrs a day x 365 days per year =

$118, 625 per year 

Didn’t expect that, did you?

It gets better. I haven’t slept a good night’s sleep in over 10 months. On average, I am awake 2 hours each night. You better believe I’m charging overtime for that shit – time and a half, baby! $37.50 x 2 = $75 per night, or $27,375 per year in overtime. That brings us to a grand total of $146,000 per year.

Looks like Susie will have some company on her shopping trip – Jimmy Choo’s… I choo-choo-choose you!

But, alas, reality sets in. Moms: your cheques are not in the mail. The reality is we are not paid in dollars. We are paid in poop-filled diapers, drool, vomit, piles of laundry and dishes, and, on a good day, a slobbering kiss. Because I’m a numbers person, on days when I feel like I am not financially contributing anything to my household, I can look at that dollar amount and see what I’m worth. Some days, it makes me feel better.

For a moment.

I need to remind myself time and time again that there isn’t a number large enough to pay mothers for what they do for their children. No dollar amount could be placed on the time I spend with my son. These moments are short-lived – I cherish each and every one of them knowing that there will come a time when I will yearn for a slobbering kiss. Every time I look into his playful eyes, I know what I am experiencing is the truest and purest form of love that exists. Every capillary and vein that leads to my heart is a ticking time bomb that is about to explode any second now because every last inch of me is so saturated with this emotion. This very moment, I think to myself it simply isn’t possible for my love to grow any more.

The very next moment, he flashes his tiny teeth with a silly grin and I am proven wrong once again. I love him even more.

Even though I’m a numbers person, I know my worth isn’t six figures like my calculations show. It’s eight figures. My payment is PURE LOVE.

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